Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Obama says swine flu started on Bush's ranch


President Barack Obama today placed blame for the outbreak of the Swine Flu on the previous administration of George W. Bush.

In a quickly called press conference Obama claimed that it was no coincidence that scientists believe the Swine Flu made its way into America over the Texas border.

Speaking without the aid of a teleprompter the president said, "There has been a great deal of, uhmm, conjecture that the current outbreak of the deadly Orthomyxovirus has found its origins in Mexico. But, the present findings of my administration prove that, in uhmm, actuality, it started on the Bush ranch in Texas. And, in a first for Mr. Bush, it spread multilaterally from there."

Former president Bush, who has allowed Dick Cheney to speak for him since leaving the presidency, met with reporters so that he alone could make his case to the public.

"This is ludicus (sic). There is no evidence whatsoever that my people, I mean, pigs, are responsible for the Ortho-my...ortho, uh, you know, that pig thing going around."

As Bush stumbled, the nation's former top dick, Vice President Cheney, stepped in to speak on the president's behalf.

"What we are seeing here is another blatant attempt by the Obama administration to blame all the world's problems on the previous administration. When, in reality, I contend, that the Swine Flu can be traced directly to excessive pork in the Obama budget.
H/T: idlewordship 

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